Indulgence

The heart of Indulgence is the amazing group of people we are lucky enough to call friends. We believe that sexy is 80% from the neck up, and the Indulgence crowd is all very interested and interesting. Engaged and engaging.

The community is more than 50 individuals strong, with roughly equal numbers of women and men, mostly couples with a good representation of sexy singles as well.

While most of our attendees are old enough to know better, in our 40s and 50s, ages range from the late 20s and early 30s to well into their 60s, and everywhere in between.

And while they represent a mix of professions, interests, and backgrounds, the common dominator is that everyone at our parties is someone we want to fuck … and who wants to fuck us.

Our philosophy (dare we say our way of life) centers around community-oriented, joyful, sex-positive group play. We deliberately seek people secure in their own sexual identity, and who are looking for the same thing we are.

We believe that humans are inherently social creatures; when we attend a book club or a dinner party, we like to do it with our close friends. And why should sex, one of the most wonderful gifts we humans have, be any different?

At Indulgence, we think sex is better when it’s shared, especially with people who you are friends with when your clothes are on.

In general, Indulgence is a better fit for “varsity players,” i.e., people who have previous experience in group play, know it’s for them, and enter into it enthusiastically. This is usually not a good fit for first timers or people who just want to watch.

We realize what we provide is not for everybody, and we don’t want anyone to be uncomfortable. If you’re at all unsure, you may want to start with a smaller group or a more standard sex party or club until you are confident this is the experience for you.

Consent

Consent is foundational at Indulgence. We don’t want anyone to get into a situation in which they are not entirely comfortable, and no one is ever expected to do anything they don’t want to. We begin with a consent circle where people share their boundaries and expectations and everyone in the group is expected to adhere to them. 

Be aware however, that we consider coming to an Indulgence party to be an act of consent in itself. We offer a communal, group play experience and that’s what people should anticipate when they arrive. If that’s not what you are looking for, we kindly request you find a party that better fits your desires.

Gender balance

We are sympathetic to the challenges of single men in the lifestyle, especially as one of our hosts is a single man. At the same time, we appreciate the importance of an appropriate gender balance for the vibe we look to create, with not more than one or two extra men (or women) per party. As we take RSVPs we closely monitor the party’s gender balance and use that to dictate the number of single men (or single women!) we let in.

Health and safety

We take health very seriously and ask that everyone be regularly tested for STIs, request you don’t come to the party if you’re feeling under the weather, and have a hard condom-use requirement for penetrative sex between all non-primary partners. Read more in Health.

Manners

It’s unfortunate that we have to even say this, but everyone (ahem, gentlemen) should mind their manners, respect consent boundaries, and use common sense. Please don’t impose yourself on anyone in an unwelcome manner, either at a party or on a text thread. Sexy, consensual play is fun; repeated unwanted advances are out of line.

Contribute

Unlike most private parties, we don’t charge a door fee. But we do ask that everyone pitches in a little. This consists of bringing your own alcohol, a light appetizer, and condoms, and helping out with after-party clean up. It actually goes quite fast and can be fun!  We also ask for occasional financial contributions to help cover our operating costs (but our annual ask is usually less than a single night at Twist!).

We care for everyone at Indulgence very deeply, and want them to go home with wonderful memories, not a bug de jour. To that end we ask attendees to observe a number of items: 

1) The U.S. is currently under a triple threat from moderate to high levels of RSV, influenza, and COVID. We ask everyone to be current in their flu and COVID vaccinations to help reduce any spread.

2) We ask everyone to stay current on your COVID vaccinations. Even though it seems to be moving to an endemic and we are no longer requiring day-of testing, please use your common sense and if you are feeling symptoms do a test – and if you’re COVID positive, please stay home.

3) If you’ve had a fever in the last 7 days or cold symptoms in the past 4 days, or even if you feel off in any way physically, mentally, or emotionally, we ask that you take a raincheck and join us for the next party. It will also be really fun.

4) We ask that everyone remain current on STI tests. Depending on your activity level, we ask you be tested on a 3-6 month cycle. Please share your status, concerns, or updates during the consent circle.

5) If you have cold sores or another breakout that could be an active case of HSV, please take a raincheck.

6) And while Monkeypox is – fortunately – on the decline, if you are a bisexual man or have had sex with a bisexual man, we encourage that you get vaccinated.

7) Condoms are mandatory for all penetrative sex, so please be sure to bring plenty of your favorites.